Thursday, 16 October 2014

Because I Don't Have a Penis My No is Not Enough #BlogActionDay

Blog action day is a day when all over the world blogs unite their voices to be heard on an issue effecting their world. This year be battle inequality with out words.

If I were a boy I could walk down the street in whatever I wanted. I could adorn shorts in Caribbean weather while living in a Caribbean country and not have to worry about some one telling me about my vagina and what they would like to do with it. If I where a boy my legs would just be legs not an invitation to sex.

If I were a boy, I could walk modestly dressed, to work and not have people yell derogatory slurs at me telling me how nice my breasts are. I could walk into the grocery store and not have employees constantly whisper objectifying terms at me while I contemplate my list. 'Like them breasts girl' wouldn't be the kind of complement that would be acceptable.

I could go out to an evening with friends and not feel my stomach drop when the evening is over, realising I have to walk to the bus stop on my own. That i have to listen to people threatening to rape me in public as their group of friends laugh and everyone else pretends not to hear.

I could walk to the bus and not have people grab a hold of me and laugh at my attempts to get away, sharing proudly that they have nothing to fear because society expects them to hurt me.

I could walk down the street grieving and not have people scream deplorable terms about my character because I could not nor would not smile on command when they told me how much they want to sleep with me even though they do not know my name and so lower my worth to one word physical attributes like 'sexy' 'sweetness' or 'nice thighs'.

If I was a boy I could easily feel safe in my own skin. I would not be expected to have my self worth decided by the words that came out of the mouths of the opposite gender. I could believe I am pretty because I am and not because someone said my type of look is nice today until they and mainstream media get bored of it.

But I wasn't born a boy. So walking the streets at night by myself or in a group is dangerous because I have a vagina...which makes people look at me and feel they have every right to take away my free will.

I am against street harassment because I just want an equal sense of safety when I walk down the street. I just want the body parts I am born with to not be used as an excuse for your choice to hurt me. I just want the freedom to walk to my bus, my groceries or my friend, or even to just stand still without your unsolicited approval. I just want to not have to be afraid to have a daughter because she will be blamed for the body she is born into and the chosen actions of her attacker.

Don't I deserve the eradication of this inequality? Don't you?

I once had a conversation with a male friend and his question was 'What's the big deal in asking someone to smile? Just smile.' The big deal is that it makes me uncomfortable. The big deal is that you don't even know me but you want me to do something on command that will make you feel better because you said so. The big deal is that you don't even know me but you are trying to dictate how I should feel better. The big deal is that you do not welcome unwanted advances, say for instance, from someone of the same gender; some one you are not attracted to but you demand that I should welcome yours. The big deal is, that I am telling you that it makes me uncomfortable  but you still feel like that is not sufficient reason to stop.

Because I don't have a penis my no is not enough.

I have the equal right to walk in the streets of my country without being harassed, stop punishing me because I don't have a penis.

It's not a compliment; it's street harassment.
What men are really saying when they catcall women?
IF we lived in a world where women catcalled men.
I am not a person to you. (warning expletives)
So, how was your day?
Peace. Love.Voice


  1. Oh my. Powerful stuff. Your line, "and feel they have every right to take away my free will" has me in tears.....(you know my situation)....this is your writing at its best. Thank you. You make me want to be better at this writing lark, to push myself further. Thank you. [Have too, too much to say about *what* you've will leave my comment at that - expect a few blog posts from me in response to your post]

  2. Feel free my friend! I look forward to reading your great posts all about how you've enjoyed or chewed upon my words in thought :) I'm glad you enjoy my writing <3 I can't say that enough!


What say you?

Blog Design by The Blog Store