At the beginning of the year I made resolutions. I purposefully made them general and simplistic, at least they seemed so to me, in order to better tackle them. It's past the half year mark now (can you BELIEVE THAT!?) so I really wanted to write an update on the process.
Things got tough, a different kind of tough, the kind where coming to a conclusion about a question was not just difficult but it wasn't as satisfying. I didn't want to catalogue it any more, I didn't want honesty that didn't seem to amount to anything. I had enough of that around me it was too much to find it inside of my head too..for a while.
As I grew more intentional about prayer and scripture and a different side of my relationship with God however, I decided to try journalling again, only in a different way this time. What did I have to lose anyway? He already knew everything!
Turns out it was just what I needed. prayer journalling was honesty with ease. I was journalling without any pressure, self applied or otherwise. It's not chalked full of hurt and anger nor doesn't make me embarrassed the thought of someone seeing it, believe it or not. It's glorious honesty without assessment and I love it!
I will likely continue for years, even though my intention was only to try it for a year.
Admittedly, I failed to keep it consistently as I had hoped. I was so embarrassed as I looked through it for the first time looking back, in relation to time. It goes JANUARY! Intentional! Full of potential and drive! Theeeeeen.......APRIL! haha Wut?! I got so busy I skipped two months straight and even after! Leaving me with only about half as much as I should have by now but am I disappointed in myself? You know....no.
When I looked at the words, I was shocked. They told me things about my strength, beliefs, courage and tenacity I did not actively know. Look at all those positive adjectives!
Life is hard, life is daunting. Sometimes it's so overpowering that we get tired of thinking about or even looking at it. Yet, golden are we that have not given up. Golden are you who have retained the strength to be here today.
Prayer journalling helped me find the drive to journal again.
Oh and I also did the other prayer resolution I set for myself, let me know if you'd like to hear about that experience. That's half of my resolutions doing pretty well so far, I'm a little impressed and very pleased haha.
How are your new years resolutions going?
Peace. Love. You're Golden.